I have never been a follower. “Mainstream” is not a word anyone would use to describe me. My free-spiritedness was not very accepted in the affluent, preppy town I grew up in. I was not a good student, had no interest in tennis or cheerleading, and certainly did not dress like the other girls with their pink and green minidresses. I liked rock and roll, embroidered jeans and happy drugs. As you can imagine, I never became corporate CEO material, and bounced from job to job throughout my adult life.
My relationships were as messy as the backseat of my Volkswagen Beetle! (Envision Time Square minutes after the New Year’s Eve crowd leaves!) I spent twenty years making bad choice after bad choice, getting my heart broken and hopes dashed, crying to my best friend and then starting the destructive pattern all over again. It was after my divorce that I finally woke up, stood up and spoke up, “I DESERVE MORE!!” That was when I took an honest inventory of my characteristics and actions. Some needed to go, and others needed to be honed – many needed to be unburied from the voices of self-doubt, fear and insecurity that I had allowed to hide my true self.
I have always had a feeling of being connected to a grand universe. I used this connection to understand that God has a plan for me, and all my bumps in the road are here to teach me and prepare me for bigger things.
It has taken my 15 years to love myself, find my self-worth and accept what a truly cool person I am. I did the work alone and it was hard! I consider all the lessons I have learned to be maps for this journey we call life, and I am happy to share my maps with you. You can borrow them, and we can use them to find maps of your own which will bring out your true self – your self love – your worthiness – and this, my friend, will open doors you thought were sealed shut. Take my hand, put on your boots (we’ll be walking through a lot of shit) and allow our connection, spirituality, and time to bring you to peace, however you define it. It will be hard work, but I can assure you, I will never leave you to do it alone.